[She trusts him, even as she's sitting on edge, worried he won't believe her. She wants to trust that he will believe her, even as crazy as it sounds.
So hearing it described as difficult, at once acknowledging it as something that happened without judging her, brings an abbreviated laugh to her lips, one dies as quickly as it bubbles out.]
Y-Yeah. That's one way to put it.
[She draws her knees in closer to her chest and rests her chin atop them, closing her eyes.]
My friend Saihara-kun... he's the Super High School Level Detective. And he thought he had a way to catch the mastermind behind all of it, so we could all escape. But I was... really, really stupid, and afraid, and I thought... I thought even if we caught them, the mastermind could just wait until the time limit ran out, a-and we'd all be killed anyway. I couldn't let that happen to everyone, s-so... I used Saihara-kun's plan to try to kill the mastermind.
Instead, my trap caught one of my dear friends instead. S-So... as part of the rules of the game, because there was a murder, everyone had to go through a trial. I tried to use the trial to catch the mastermind again, but... it turns out there probably wasn't even a single person behind all of it that we could catch. It was impossible. So... I forced Saihara-kun to expose me as the killer.
[Her fingers dig in against her legs as she keeps her eyes closed.]
I was dragged out of the trial ground and-- hanged. Picked up and dropped over a giant piano, over and over and over and over. I could only breathe when my feet touched the keys, and only for an instant, then I was being strangled again. It felt like it went on forever.
[Another glance toward Minato, her eyes glimmering with tears.]
I never, never want any of my friends to go through something like that. Dying. You always act so cool all the time, but... that's why I was so mad. I was so scared. 'Cause... 'cause I was afraid you were gonna lock all that inside and suffer.
[ Her death was arranged to mock her for her interests and make a spectacle out of her. They wanted to strip her of any dignity or pride she had in her choices. They're horrible, treating his friend like that. The way they removed her agency...
Minato shakes his head. ]
How I died... I chose how it happened. Everything about it was mine. You chose to die too but... the arrangement wasn't yours.
[ She had no say in the implementation of her death. ]
[She's quiet, body wound tight with tension as her eyes flick over his face. Goro, and now Minato, are the only ones who know the full story of what happened; Qrow and some of the others only know the bare details. It's not something she shares easily.]
Does that really make a difference? [she asks, very softly. If she'd just-- been executed in a normal way, if she'd just been hanged without all the over-the-top psychopop, would she be able to sleep at night? Or would she have been dead before the Director could have reached her?
She doesn't know. She can't know. And it's that question, and many, many others, that keep her up at night.]
It's been months, but I still have trouble sleeping. Do you remember... what I told you back on Maru?
[About how she'd been able to sleep without nightmares because she was sleeping next to him? That.]
I guess what I'm trying to say is... if there's anything I can do to help you, you just have to ask. If... if you're still okay being friends with a murderer like me.
[ It would make a difference to him, he thinks. He hasn't been having nightmares about what happened. He hasn't been beating himself up over what ifs. He doesn't need the reassurance of another person by his side when he sleeps. Whether or not it makes a difference to her, he can't truly say.
Being friends with a murderer though? He can handle that. If he can be friends with the orphaner Shinjiro Aragaki and the professional assassin Goro Akechi, he can definitely be friends with the well-intentioned extremist Kaede Akamatsu. ]
I'm still your friend...
[ As for helping him.... ]
You could disguise yourself as me so I don't have to go to these events.
[ It's a joke, he doesn't expect Kaede to do anything like that, but also they're such a pain. He just wants to sleep. ]
[All her tension leaves her body all at once when he says he's still her friend, and she sags against her knees. It's still so strange and startling that everyone just accepts her so easily, even when they learn the truth about what she did. But she doesn't want to question his acceptance, not really. She wants to be his friend still, no matter what. Even if he hated her, she'd want that.
So she can't help but laugh at his request, just from the emotional overload if nothing else.]
I don't know how well that would work... we don't sound anything alike.
[Actually, wait. Her eyes widen with realization.]
Ah, but you're really quiet already. I could just nod at people. Aaah, jeez, you shouldn't use me to get out of events!
[ All the other negative effects around his ressurection are gone but this stayed behind. He never truly appreciated his ability to nap wherever and whenever. What a blessing it was. Now he struggles to get a restful night's sleep... ]
[She giggles at him. Exercise is probably good for him? She's pretty sure, anyway. That's what her teachers said whenever she had to sit on the bench during P.E. anyway.]
Well... if it starts really becoming a problem, I can cast Sleep on you again. I should probably practice keeping that going anyway, huh? In case we need to knock somebody out for a while.
[ She was really tired after singing for a few hours last time. She doesn't need to wear herself out like that again. Though he imagines playing violin for hours like that would end up hurting his wrist.
Goro-kun and Komaeda-kun have nice voices, but there's just something sweeter about hearing a girl sing, right? Maybe I should take voice lessons when we get back...
[The last bit is said mostly to herself. Honoka is a real school idol, after all! Kaede will have to work hard to catch up!]
Oh, but I think you have a nice voice too, Arisato-kun, don't feel bad.
[ He doesn't know if his own voice is nice, or melodic, or anything a singer requires their voice to be. It works fine though, and that's enough for him. ]
[If they ever get to go back to the moon again, maybe!!
She nods and slips the poem into her pocket for now. When they get back to the cabin, she'll add it to the memory scrapbook Akechi gave her for her birthday. It's not a happy memory, but it is something she wants to keep with her, no matter what.
Then she turns and wraps her arms around him in a hug, closing her eyes and resting her chin on his shoulder.]
Thank you... for listening to me. And... for explaining everything to me, too.
[ She can hug him for as long as she wants. He doesn't fuss about it. ]
... Is there... anything you want to know about me?
[ It seems fair to share something about himself, and he thinks she would like that, but he doesn't know what would be most interesting to her. He isn't a musical prodigy like she is. He hasn't murdered a person either, though he's sure that's more circumstantial than anything. ]
[She laughs quietly, keeping her arms wrapped around him a little longer before drawing back. She doesn't go far, though, kneeling in the grass across from him so she can get a better look at his face than she could when she was sitting beside him.]
I said it before, didn't I...? I want to know all kinds of things about you. And... if you want to know anything about me, I don't... have anything else to keep secret.
[But hmm, a question. The most important one to her, even more important than knowing about Orpheus or SEES or any of that,] Well... why did you start playing violin?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
gotyourbach) wrote2018-11-11 08:24 pm
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So hearing it described as difficult, at once acknowledging it as something that happened without judging her, brings an abbreviated laugh to her lips, one dies as quickly as it bubbles out.]
Y-Yeah. That's one way to put it.
[She draws her knees in closer to her chest and rests her chin atop them, closing her eyes.]
My friend Saihara-kun... he's the Super High School Level Detective. And he thought he had a way to catch the mastermind behind all of it, so we could all escape. But I was... really, really stupid, and afraid, and I thought... I thought even if we caught them, the mastermind could just wait until the time limit ran out, a-and we'd all be killed anyway. I couldn't let that happen to everyone, s-so... I used Saihara-kun's plan to try to kill the mastermind.
Instead, my trap caught one of my dear friends instead. S-So... as part of the rules of the game, because there was a murder, everyone had to go through a trial. I tried to use the trial to catch the mastermind again, but... it turns out there probably wasn't even a single person behind all of it that we could catch. It was impossible. So... I forced Saihara-kun to expose me as the killer.
[Her fingers dig in against her legs as she keeps her eyes closed.]
I was dragged out of the trial ground and-- hanged. Picked up and dropped over a giant piano, over and over and over and over. I could only breathe when my feet touched the keys, and only for an instant, then I was being strangled again. It felt like it went on forever.
[Another glance toward Minato, her eyes glimmering with tears.]
I never, never want any of my friends to go through something like that. Dying. You always act so cool all the time, but... that's why I was so mad. I was so scared. 'Cause... 'cause I was afraid you were gonna lock all that inside and suffer.
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Minato shakes his head. ]
How I died... I chose how it happened. Everything about it was mine. You chose to die too but... the arrangement wasn't yours.
[ She had no say in the implementation of her death. ]
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Does that really make a difference? [she asks, very softly. If she'd just-- been executed in a normal way, if she'd just been hanged without all the over-the-top psychopop, would she be able to sleep at night? Or would she have been dead before the Director could have reached her?
She doesn't know. She can't know. And it's that question, and many, many others, that keep her up at night.]
It's been months, but I still have trouble sleeping. Do you remember... what I told you back on Maru?
[About how she'd been able to sleep without nightmares because she was sleeping next to him? That.]
I guess what I'm trying to say is... if there's anything I can do to help you, you just have to ask. If... if you're still okay being friends with a murderer like me.
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Being friends with a murderer though? He can handle that. If he can be friends with the orphaner Shinjiro Aragaki and the professional assassin Goro Akechi, he can definitely be friends with the well-intentioned extremist Kaede Akamatsu. ]
I'm still your friend...
[ As for helping him.... ]
You could disguise yourself as me so I don't have to go to these events.
[ It's a joke, he doesn't expect Kaede to do anything like that, but also they're such a pain. He just wants to sleep. ]
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So she can't help but laugh at his request, just from the emotional overload if nothing else.]
I don't know how well that would work... we don't sound anything alike.
[Actually, wait. Her eyes widen with realization.]
Ah, but you're really quiet already. I could just nod at people. Aaah, jeez, you shouldn't use me to get out of events!
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He shrugs at her. ]
It was worth a shot.
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As long as it's not something that could hurt my hands, maybe I'll do it once or twice for you. But not everything, okay?
[Her laughter fades, but her smile doesn't.]
I'm... really glad we're friends, Arisato-kun. Thank you.
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Me too.
[ He looks out to the lake for a moment. ]
... I haven't had any nightmares. Or regrets.
[ He has had trouble sleeping, which she's probably noticed by now, but it's not like it's thoughts of his death that are keeping him awake. ]
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[She'd almost forgotten about the piece of paper with his poem in her lap, the edges crinkled from her fidgeting earlier.]
I mean... you've been awake when I was awake at night, so I thought... maybe you were dwelling on it and didn't want to say anything.
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Sleeping is difficult now. Don't know why.
[ All the other negative effects around his ressurection are gone but this stayed behind. He never truly appreciated his ability to nap wherever and whenever. What a blessing it was. Now he struggles to get a restful night's sleep... ]
Why won't the world just let me sleep.
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[She's teasing him, it's obvious in her voice, but also maybe it's a little bit true?]
Maybe you just have to tire yourself out more!
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I'd rather not.
[ Let him be lazy!! ]
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Well... if it starts really becoming a problem, I can cast Sleep on you again. I should probably practice keeping that going anyway, huh? In case we need to knock somebody out for a while.
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[ She was really tired after singing for a few hours last time. She doesn't need to wear herself out like that again. Though he imagines playing violin for hours like that would end up hurting his wrist.
Or, they're in a cabin full of bards... ]
Maybe get someone to take shifts with.
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[It's not the choice of instrument, it's the magical force of will to maintain the spell. She hasn't quite connected the two yet.
She trails off as he continues, mouth falling into a surprised O.]
Yeah, that's a good idea! I'll check with the others and see who else knows that spell!
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[ Deku and Bokugo are so damn loud. He can't imagine anything they could play for him would put him to sleep even with magic. ]
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[She tilts her head with some confusion, then her expression clears.]
Oh! Is it because a girl's voice is a lot nicer to listen to? I think so, too!
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Yeah. That's it.
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[The last bit is said mostly to herself. Honoka is a real school idol, after all! Kaede will have to work hard to catch up!]
Oh, but I think you have a nice voice too, Arisato-kun, don't feel bad.
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[ He doesn't know if his own voice is nice, or melodic, or anything a singer requires their voice to be. It works fine though, and that's enough for him. ]
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[She likes to listen to him talk... she just wishes there was, you know. More to listen to!
She picks up the folded poem with one hand, thumb rubbing against the outside again.]
Umm... is it okay if I keep this?
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Minato doesn't think it would make the music more powerful but it can't hurt either, right?
He nods at her request. ]
Yeah. It's for you.
[ He wrote it for her. And anyone else that wanted to grill him on how he died, technically, but mostly it was for Kaede. ]
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She nods and slips the poem into her pocket for now. When they get back to the cabin, she'll add it to the memory scrapbook Akechi gave her for her birthday. It's not a happy memory, but it is something she wants to keep with her, no matter what.
Then she turns and wraps her arms around him in a hug, closing her eyes and resting her chin on his shoulder.]
Thank you... for listening to me. And... for explaining everything to me, too.
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... Is there... anything you want to know about me?
[ It seems fair to share something about himself, and he thinks she would like that, but he doesn't know what would be most interesting to her. He isn't a musical prodigy like she is. He hasn't murdered a person either, though he's sure that's more circumstantial than anything. ]
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I said it before, didn't I...? I want to know all kinds of things about you. And... if you want to know anything about me, I don't... have anything else to keep secret.
[But hmm, a question. The most important one to her, even more important than knowing about Orpheus or SEES or any of that,] Well... why did you start playing violin?
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